Love

The night when she left me home ,
They say I stood silent and numb ;
down in the frozen storm .

But within I could feel my heart bleed ;
“Aaah !!” the pain never seemed to die,
And hours after hours ;
even the tears seems reluctant to subside,

“Can she hear me now ??”, I cried out aloud ,
But in vain ;
They say , “she can never come back alive !
Never again ,,,,”
I didn’t believe them ,, not even a word they say ,
She promised to stay with me again & again !!

A small Discussion with my friend Chethan

Date - 9/30/09
Hi Chethan ,

The celebration of Durga Pooja is over and suddenly
everything becomes so silent once again and yes I am back to work
again. You know chethan , earlier a lot of relatives , friends used
to make a hugh gathering but nowadays , no one has time . Few old
friends visited ( most (friends and relatives)of them are settled
abroad). I spend time some of my precious time with my family. You
know , I feel , how beautiful is the relationship between each
other in a family . They(particularly my parents) don't have any
wants, they love you without any condition , immaterial of what
qualities you have , I believe , if you don't have anything still I
know they will stand up for you. Truly , this if this is called the
Maya ,, I surely love it and my life would have been been insipid
without it .

You are a Doctor , tell me what is a difference between a Dead
man , man living in a society and a man who had attained spiritual
salvation ?


Regards,

Anirban

Reply |Chethan Belludi to me show details 9/30/09


Hi Anirban,

It's nice to hear from you. I am also glad to note that you really enjoyed your vacations with people whom you treasure, of course, that too during the auspicious days of Durga Pooja. Being in Boston, I am missing all the culture, pooja and of course the fun.

And just as you noted, our parents love us inspite of everything. Yeah, that's what is called "unconditional" love [cannot be "conditioned" by any external agent]. I would like to tell you something from my personal experience. One of my highschool friends got in touch with me after nearly, say 8 yrs. I was happy on one hand, but I was very much disgusted after I learnt that he had attempted a suicide and somehow survived. And the reason being, ditched by a girl. I scolded him right away. That girl loved him all the way for some 3 yrs and now because she's getting a better match - the new guy is in a better "financial" position, she's ditching him. My God! Is that love? That can't be anything better than a business, a good business I must say. As you rightly pointed out, in Love, there's no expectation. I don't know if had shared with you this quote of Swami Vivekananda, I don't mind repeating it:

"We will illustrate love by a triangle, of which the first angle at the base is fearlessness. So long as there is fear, it is not love. Love banishes all fear. A mother with her baby will face a tiger to save her child. The second angle is that love never asks, never begs. The third or the apex is that love loves for the sake of love itself. Even the idea of object vanishes. Love is the only form in which love is loved. This is the highest abstraction and the same as the Absolute."

That's pure love!

And as far as your other question is concerned, I might give you some answer based on my understanding of Biology. But I am sure, neither I nor you will be satisfied with it. The question needs to answered from at least three dimensions - Biology, Physics and Philosophy. So, rather than making a single dimensional attempt, I would like to attempt it from all three dimensions (there may be other dimensions I may not be knowing as of now!). But I must really appreciated your question. It has given me some food for thought and let me see how well I can digest it!

Hope everything else is fine. Keep in touch. It's nice to have friends like you. Take care.

--
Best Wishes,
Chet
- Show quoted text -



On Wed, Sep 30, 2009 at 10:36 AM, anir4ul bagchi wrote:


Reply |anir4ul bagchi to Chethan show details 10/1/09


Hi Chethan,
Truly , you have scripted it wonderfully and Swami
Vivekananda's description on issue on 'Love ' is most apt and is
surely divine. I can't explain this word as it comes in different
shades and colours of life , can't be expressed by just words. It has
been going in for ages and still remains mysterious to any living
being.
The word Love has lost is essence in the modern terminology
where it is just an expression to fulfill your needs and wants . The
circumstances endeared by your friend is the most common phenomenon
humans had experienced . Was this Love my friend , have your friend
loved her or his so called girlfriend did is quite really a puzzle .
They had expectation from each other ( for their own self)
off-course different in nature . Your friend , didn't meet his
expectation so he succumb by grief of failure . The question is - "
Is this Love ? " The perspective may be different but this is nothing
but wants . As Sri Ramkrishna says , " Do you know why their is so
much apathy and sorrow in this world ?" A simple question to be
answered yet remain a mystery to human kind . Let me correct myself
once again ,, "Yes Love is expectation " but not for oneself but for
them who we "Love" .

Our human nature as you already know comprises of five elements ,
" Kam , krodh , lobh , moho , matsarya ." and love exist and non
exist in every element/form. Truly as the words of Vivekananda
correctly meant that we look into the world only through the senses
we have , yes , normally we gets attracted to beautiful ( here you
can correct me ! ) in this world which we ourselves define . Does
this mean every aspects of our feeling comes through these senses ?
Someone just said to me ,, How can you love someone whom you haven't
met ,, truly it doesn't fall in the so called definition of Love ,
science says our mind creates some image or our likeness( generates
through time and space) embedded deep inside our subtle thoughts and
whenever mind needs the feeding it gives you a delusion . In such case
, you are in "Love" with a virtual being ( may not be the same person
in reality) and still you don't expect that she will Love you - "
Is this Love ?"

Now , the Question comes " Have you seen God ?" " Do you Love Him
?" No we haven't seen him but millions and million people Love Him
, yes they also Expect from Him ? It can be stated like a new born
who expect his mother to feed Him ? and from the sense , he can very
well understand his mother touch ( you know this very well as a
doctor)

A question asked to Sri Ramkrishna ,, " have you seen God ?" ,,
Yes he said ,, the next Question placed ,,, " Where is SHE ?" He
said , " Everywhere " , Someone asked ,, " what do you want ? " He
answered Nothing " Just see want to see Her more and more " - Is this
Love ?

So , once again , contradictory thoughts , on "Love " surfaced as usual.

Do love have priorities ?or it can be placed in a different way ,
'loves come in different form ,' so , let us take up your friend
example , You said , 3 yrs he was in a relationship with a girl ,
so called love for the girl prioritize his love for his
family/friends ( I hope he is 26 yrs now) , so ,, may be the answer
is yes ?


,,, as I told you before ,, its just how we perceive (nothing bad
, nothing good )and cannot be explained ,,, so may be we can now
define it to an extent ,, a difference between a Dead man , Living
man and a Spiritual Man through an expression called "Love" .

Chethan , philosophy gives you an exposure to human mind and is
essential for a strong character development. I am thankful to you,
my friend that you breed similar attitude towards life .

Thanks ,

Anirban


Reply |Chethan Belludi to me show details 10/1/09


Hi Anirban,

You brought out some reality in the discussion. The expectations in Love exist. The new born loves its mother and expects care in return! Men love God and expect worldly prosperity in return. These are some of the built-in behaviours, natural instincts of the human beings. It's like those "default settings." It takes a great deal of expertise to crack the code of human life and a change those settings. Most importantly, we need the guidance of a "Guru."

And as you pointed out from Sri Ramakrishna's life, his system operated at a totally different level than ours. He was a man of realisation and hence, all those natural laws that play around us, no longer are applicable to him. He sort of undergoes a paradigm shift from "maya" to reality. The characteristics of the living person varies greatly from that of the dead. As a extension to this a man of spiritual realisation varies greatly from that of the living. Understanding the physical and spiritual properties of the "man of realisation" will help us differentiate between him and the living man. Nevertheless it's worth trying!

Keep it going. It's indeed my pleasure too, to have such a wonderful discussion. Take care.

--
Best Wishes,
Chethan

On Fri, Oct 2, 2009 at 3:12 AM, anir4ul bagchi wrote:

Hi Chethan,
I am still puzzled , normally we associate Doctor's thoughts
inclined more towards a Biological mind frame but truly you are a
different and intellectual blend. You know , I had read a most
interesting quote ,, " A man quality endeavored brings him fame but
a character well endeavored bring him name." Surely , Good discussion
is more enjoyable than anything in the world . Thanks to you friend.

Today , is a Holiday ( 2nd OCtober) and I am a little feverish
and so sleeping tight .

Regards,

Anirban



Hi Anirban,

That was a great quote and thanks for your compliments.

Yes, it's common to associate a doctor to be in a Biological frame of mind. But having seen the profession from within, I don't have words to describe. The ugly truth is, most of them are in the commercial frame of mind! I hardly came across doctors with a "scientific frame of mind." I have written a blog on one of my bitter experiences with doctors in "Doctors, Media and Advertisement."

http://ckbelludi.blogspot.com/2007/09/doctors-media-and-advertisement.html

During our convocation, there was a "Video Souvenir" event and all of us were asked to speak for "30 seconds," about our experience in the Medical College. I spoke, "After spending 5 yrs in this 'great' college, I am now ashamed to call myself a doctor. And you want me to speak about it? Neither are 30 seconds enough, nor do I find the right word to describe this great college! Good luck, Bye."

The stigma hangs on and till today, I feel uncomfortable when someone addresses me as a 'doctor.' No harsh feelings towards you. I would prefer to be seen as any other common man.

Anyways, even I am happy to have found a friend like you to discuss some topics which are 'worthwhile.' I have a lot of friends but there are only 3 or 4 of them who are interested in these kind of discussions. I am happy to add you to that list!

You have a long weekend again.. Take time to relax. I hope the fever is not bothersome. Get well soon. Take care.



--
Best Wishes,
C h e t h a n K B e l l u d i

"It would be possible to describe everything scientifically, but it would make no sense; it would be without meaning, as if you described a Beethoven symphony as a variation of wave pressure."
-Albert Einstein

Reply |anir4ul bagchi to Chethan show details 10/3/09


Dear Chethan ,

I am doing fine today. Thanks . Yesterday , I read few of
your blogs , I will come into it but let me first tell you
something - experiences ( sometimes bitter) teaches you many things
is your life , but its important for us not to carry out the stigma in
your entire life , I know it is easier said than done. Once me
father told me I still remember , may be he read it somewhere , - " A
leader needs no followers ". Man created work(profession ) for their
own betterment , it is Man who had disparage the profession for their
own needs , wishes and whims and it will be Man to bring it in proper
direction . We are all earthly , common but its important for us to
directed ourselves . You may disagree with the terminology but it
gives you the opportunity to undertake the Right path - A Robert
Frost Poem - " A Road not taken " is the most beautiful and apt .

"Happiness " - a phenomenon , we all have experience in our
life time or may be not , it would take me an era to debate on this
issue , but let me discuss on an example of the waiter turned into a
business tycoon . He conclusively stated that ,," He was happy when
he was a waiter." . Let me change the story and frame it likewise ,
that he had a dream as a waiter to become a Hotelier , but his dream
didn't fulfill , like millions of waiters in the country ,, the
question is Will he be Happy ?" The truth is No , he wouldn't have
like millions of waiters in our country. Money( I hate this
terminology , better state this as resources (Barter System))
increased our potential to fulfill our desires , it is the desires
which had not perfected in a inane character which led to
unhappiness , thus resources is not a issue it is our heart that
embeds our desires. Success doesn't justify a strong character.

Resources are important in our Societal life , even Swamiji
couldn't have delegated the thoughts to a common man , build up
avenues and places to create a strong character. A common man too
breeds in resources to feed his children and help his ailing mother .
Let me share with you a wonderful story , I don't know , I had read
it some where or not , one day when I woke up , the thought came to me
, and I started to think ,,,,,,

This is a story a four family member , three son's and a
mother , the mother cared and fed her son till they have grown up .
The mother has gone old , and now it was for the Sons to look after
them , the first son took kept his mother with him , the second son
left to pursue a better career goal , the third son left in search of
divine truth , after few years the first son left his mother
grudgingly unable to take care of her due to financial problems . Now
, the question comes , who is more responsible for his mother fate ?

Thanks and Regards,

Anirban

Choto duto kobita

A Mystic lady.

Your eyes make the Sun Shine ,

Your smile’s make them bright ;

Your hair seems a cascade in sprite adorn with stars nine ,

Like a dove sitting on a castle floor ,

A symbol of love we all know ,

Under the moon lit sky her face brightly shone,

She was no one else but this lovely lady alone.

Bhalobasa ??

Bhalobasa kare koy ,

ei niye royche soki mor songsoy ;

Chintito mor bathito pran ,

Er hath theke nai ki poritran ;

Buji nai er ortho ;

Jani na ki tar sartho ,

Beej photai dui mooney ;

Seeshe dora dei ki tara baahoo bondhone ;

Laav hoi ki tar ei hridoyer milaney,

Kono odbhut sondikhoney.

Devotion is what they say

Devotion a familiar word stranded on both ends of life . A word personifies an essence of existence still they say we are obsessed , is this a life transgressing like a veil under the darkness , ha ! nothing to prove just a point endeared with a realization to bring in hope . Still they say , “ Hope for what ?” Presumptuously denying the creation of mankind . Here in, look at the Manifestation of Hope which transpires like an imbibition in every heart that follow a pathway of spiritual sanctity but still they say us to spread the message of love,,,

Love a simplification of an expression which re-incarnates the believe of beautification in every minds , an intense desire beholding other in the purview of mutual co-existence . Yes , she opened her eyes acknowledging her individual existence for the first time devoting herself in the tranquility of nature .


( to be continued ,,,,,)